College Change

I actually woke up early-ish today, but then when I finished breakfast I went upstairs to read some more of Half-Blood Prince. I succeeded in reading for a good half hour to 40 minutes, and then apparently at some point I fell asleep. And woke up 30 minutes later. *sigh* I don't understand why all my body wants me to do is sleep...But whatever. Hopefully I can still fall asleep tonight before midnight for our hike tomorrow! :D

I spent the rest of the afternoon doing the Alcohol Education online thing for my college. I do understand why they want all college students to do this, especially incoming freshman. People make big mistakes in college with drinking and think they have to drink to fit in. But honestly, almost everything on there I already knew from Chemistry class. I know that sounds weird, but one of the options we did for our IB test was Medicine and Drugs, and we had to learn very clearly alcohol laws and blood alcohol concentration and such things. The only stuff I didn't really know was how to look for alcohol poisoning, and to be honest, I'm really hoping I just don't end up hanging out with people who drink that much. I have vowed to just not drink in college, definitely not until I'm 21, and I actually don't really plan to drink much at all...I don't think it would be good for the way my brain works. I seem to be wired to act compulsively. Basically, I'm not complaining that we had to take it--I think it's a good idea--but it took far too long to finish.

I also watched some X-Files. At the beginning of the summer I started watching all the mythology episodes, and sometime in July I kind off stopped because I didn't want to run out. But now I still have the movie and seasons 6-9 mythology, so I suppose I'm good. I guess I can watch those in the next two weeks while I'm packing. :) I also went for a lovely jog, though it was a bit too warm and far too dry for my liking. And of course about an hour later it was raining, so if I'd just waited an hour I could've run in the rain, which I love. But ah well. There was a reason I had to go earlier in the day. And that reason is.....

I finally talked to my advisor today!!! Woohoo!!!!!!!!! We got my schedule all fixed, changed my math class, and added a Cultural Anthropology class. It fits into one of the General Education requirements, and it's a class I'm actually genuinely interested in taking, so that's good. I really like my advisor; she's incredibly nice and helpful for choosing classes.

And now it's 2 weeks until I leave for college. Aaaaaaaaaaaaah! It's kind of terrifying, for reasons personal to me. I have to make sure I stay healthy and happy and keep taking care of myself, which might become a challenge once I'm under stress at college. (I would elaborate on this, but it is very complicated, and I'm not sure how open I want to be with people here. Again, if people seem interested and caring, maybe I'll do a special edition of confessions one Saturday.) I have to not be afraid to take risks or say no to people, and remember my values and why I'm attending college. But I'm mostly excited. I've lived for far too long under control of my parents, held down by their fighting and pressures, living in anxiety, blah, blah, blah. I mean, I really love my dad, and I think I'll miss him the most, but I'm curious as to how I let my life run and how I take care of myself when I truly am relying on myself and having to make my own decisions, living with other people.

I think that's why college is such a big step for everyone. Unless you're one of the people who goes to community college and lives with your parents,* it's the first time we live on our own. We don't yet have every adult opportunity, but we have to figure out how to live on our own in the society, with a job and studying and friends who will help us along the way. Most of us are still connected to our parents since they pay for college, so we haven't completely cut off that chain, but it's a nice way for us to live in the real world while still being able to have fun and experiment with our passions and desires.

I said last year that I don't like change. But I have a different stance now. In the past year, I've made an awful lot of changes in myself and the way I live. Change still scares me, but I've come to realize that we can only grow if we accept change and go along with that flow. If we don't change, we stay stuck. Instead of being a fish swimming in the river, we're a rock that the water flows around. We need to move with the water as best we can and learn how to live. Learn how to thrive.

So yeah. 2 weeks. A big change coming up. But I'm working toward making it a good and smooth change. :D

Anyway. I'm not sure how good tomorrow's blog will be, since I have no idea when we're coming home and I will be exhausted after hiking for 9 miles. But I'll do my best to make the confessions interesting and hopefully a little funny.

Cheers!

Word of the Day: mundify--to purge or purify

Inspirational quote/photo of the day: “They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.” -Andy Warhol

Days until I leave for college: 14.125

*I am not saying this is a bad thing. Community colleges offer a good core education for a cheap price. Do what's right for you.