Things I need to do

Yay! I just got back from watching the movie with my friends. We went to see 30 Minutes or Less, which is not exactly my type of movie. Certain points were funny, but in general...it was just a movie. And I realize that most current movies are that way, which is exactly why I don't see many movies in theaters. But it was still fun. I got to see my friends and laugh and talk, and the movie was only 7 dollars with the military discount, so whatever. However, as I am writing this blog, I am going to put on at least the beginning of Elizabethtown until I finish and go to bed. Because that's a good movie. One of my favorite movies.

..................

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh, that's better. A good movie. An underrated movie, but a beautiful one.

I really have no idea what to blog about today. (tonight?) I'm still really shook up about the accident yesterday, and I've been trying to find ways to comfort myself and distract myself all day, but mostly I just feel really stupid, because no one else in my family has gotten into a car accident that was even partially my fault. And I usually don't think I'm all that bad of a driver--I use turn signals, brake far before I probably have to, and pretty much never speed. But clearly something happened yesterday that does not equate to good driver, and while no one got hurt, and I only have to pay around 200 bucks for the damages, I just feel really stupid. And I'm going to continue beating myself up for it for a long time, because that's just what I do to myself. Over little things, and big things, and this definitely isn't a little thing. *sigh*

Happier things, now, maybe? I have decided to make this blog a list of things I need to do, because at this hour I really have nothing else and I need to make a list like this anyway. So here's a list for you.

Things I need to do in the next 10 days:

1. Pack. Like starting now. Well, tomorrow, but you get my point.

I really do know that I need to pack, despite what my dad keeps saying. I actually like packing and organizing stuff. So, tomorrow I will do a load of laundry and then start setting aside what I can pack away already and what I want to keep out for the next week or so before packing everything away. I'll probably do a load next week to, at which point I will probably be down to wearing sweatpants and a couple dresses I don't really wear very often that I won't be bringing with me. Because what I definitely need in Hawaii is my dresses and shorts and short sleeved t-shirts. I also need to make sure I make a list of things I need to bring to Hawaii, like clothes and my umbrella and toiletry stuff, and stuff I should buy in Hawaii. I mean, of course I'll have to wait until I'm in the dorm to see what all I need to buy. But that's what I do: make lists, organize, pack things away.

So yeah. Stuff I have to do. Also in the meantime I need to....

2. Practice my dance. Sometime in the next two days. A lot.

I committed about 3 weeks ago to performing a dance in front of this group of girls I meet with once a month. And I really do want to do it. And I also still remember most of the dance, since I choreographed and performed it in December. But I do need to practice it to get the timing and details right. Yes. Sometime in the middle of all that packing and washing clothes, I need to practice.

And in the midst of those two things, I need to not forget to...

3. Call one of my good friends who I need to see before I leave.

I love this girl. She's supported me so much throughout the hardest times of my life. She's seen me at my darkest, and still loves me in spite of that. So while this one seems small, I need to call her. I want to see her and thank her before I leave for college. Because it's been far too long since we've had a good long talk.

And while I'm on the phone, I should...

4. Figure out the money stuff for college. Like, seriously, you gave me the financial aid, so please have my account reflect that.

On my eBill account for Hawaii, it still has the entire 9,000 dollar tuition cost for this semester, but I got two scholarships, money from the school, and a loan from the government. And I really don't understand why my account doesn't reflect those things yet. So yes. While I am on the phone, I will try my best to call the financial aid people at Hawaii and get this stuff figured out.

Oh. And in the midst of all that? I have to try to get over my upset feelings, which probably means I will:

5. Try to stop beating myself up. Distract myself and hope I don't have to drive again for a long time.

I don't know if I can stop beating myself up. I hate feeling stupid and scared and anxious and all that crap, but I do. I feel that way. So yes. Hopefully all of these things will distract me, and hopefully I'll be okay. Driving isn't worth it.

*sigh* I am enjoying Elizabethtown, at least. I probably should go to bed.

Cheers!

Word of the Day: copacetic--fine, completely satisfactory

Inspirational quote/photo of the day:

Days until I leave for college: 9