Let's start off this blog with some EXCITING NEWS. I think we finally found the apartment we will be living in next year. My one friend and I both filled out and signed the papers and put down $500 toward the deposit. So we just have to get our other 2 roommates to sign the paperwork and figure out if we need cosigners. And then, fingers crossed that everything works out, we will have a place to live. And it's really nice. Not too small, in a nice community, only 11 minutes from the bus stop and the general downtown campus. I definitely would've preferred to live on this side, but I think in the end it will be better to be kind of in the middle of everything. More buses go downtown, so it'll be easier to get home and get places.
That was what I spent most of today doing. I finished my flaschards for Psych. Because, you know, that'll probably be my easiest final, so of course it's the only one so far I'm trying to study for. Well, and Stats. I made my little study guide for that on Wednesday/Thursday. Ha. I'll get to marine bio and comm eventually. Honestly, I'm not too worried about any of my finals. I'm going to study for them a lot still because I want to get As in my classes if possible, but I'm not freaking out. Probably helps that only Stats and Psych are cumulative. Plus, in Comm more of my grade rides on the paper I turned in on Thursday, so we'll just see where that goes.
My main stressor really was trying to find a place to live. And while we're not for sure yet, just having an application somewhere and money toward a beautiful little place is taking a load of my chest. And I'm done with my papers, done with finding flights to Connecticut, and I've even packed up most of my stuff.
However, I haven't been too productive since like...eight o'clock. Woops. I mean, overall, I feel okay about today because I: 1) Made all my flashcards for Psych 2) Found an apartment! 3) Continued to pack up two more drawers 4) Found and scanned in all of my bank and pay statements to e-mail to to the apartment realtor 5) Printed out the slips to mail back my rented books 6) Searched for options for selling back my other books 7) Talked to my mom for an hour, which I haven't done since...forever, really. Probably end of November. Because even when I was home we didn't really talk much.
However, it is now 11:30. And I really should, this weekend, write my reflective letter for writing, revise my shark literature review paper, and then STUDY. But I feel good about Psych and I have tomorrow in the library to study. I feel bad sometimes not doing work at work, but on the weekends there isn't really much to do. I even asked last Sunday if the reference librarian needed my help, and she said no. Plus around finals time they really do always just tell us to study. I'm going to miss that when I have to get an off-campus job in August...
But anyway. I might be going to Maui with my mom in August. Might. I'm always a little hesitant about these things, because while I do want to repair my relationship with my mom, I know she doesn't have much money and also isn't very good at managing it. Plus she's sick and I want her to put all of her spirit and energy and strength (and money) into helping herself get through painful treatments. But she does know her situation better than I do, and I also know she really needs a vacation. So I can't really say no. I mean, I could, but I don't really feel capable of doing so. We'll see what happens. Because I do probably need a week here to settle into my apartment before school starts and we'll have to look at what the real cost would be.
Honestly, my life does feel a little scrambled right now, but I'm actually amazed at how well I've handled it. I kind of had a freak out last weekend because I didn't know anything about my living situation or Connecticut and I hadn't finished my Comm paper yet, etc, etc. But I'm mostly okay. Staying strong. Taking care of myself when I need to. Taking far too many breaks to watch old YouTube videos...And I'm proud of myself for avoiding eating disordered behaviors. That's a big step and a big change for me--different from IB exam time/graduation last year, definitely.
9 more days until I'm home. Then I have 3 weeks of calm before heading out on my own for 9 weeks. It's funny how much my life has changed, how independent I am, and how comfortable I am with it.
I'm a much stronger person than I used to be.
Or, maybe I just believe in my strength and my ability to get through things more now.
Cheers!
Inspirational quote/photo of the day: "Our bodies are our gardens--our wills are our gardeners." ~William Shakespeare
Word of the day: dandle--to dance (a child) on one's knees; the action taken by a dandler
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